THE PENDULUM SWINGS

“Reflect upon your present blessings of which every man has many,  not on your past misfortunes, of which all men have some.” Charles Dickens.

Do you know by default we are designed to always think of the negative events in our lives? It takes practice to change this mentality. Positive thinking is a conscious decision that becomes ingrained in us through consistent behavior. Think of all things that stood out for you this year. What's the first thing that pops into your mind? Write down the thought, then decide on its nature. Is it a positive event or negative event?




It is exactly twenty-one days to the end of this year and it is a wonderful time to reflect on our experiences. For me, this year has been quite a roller coaster. For the first time in a long time, I had to face me. The real me, not the facade. I literally had to strip down mentally and figure out how to rebuild myself. Honestly, now, I am so grateful I had the opportunity to experience all that. I have learnt so many truths this year than I have in the past several years. I choose to share some of my positive lessons, for it is through reflection that we create meaning to events whilst using the opportunities as learning tools.

1. It's not always about you

 In our daily interactions take time to stop addressing problems from a very self-centered perspective. Seek to empathize first and find out if the other party is well enough to meet you in your interactions halfway. Wondering how this is applicable? Here is a  basic example: Ever texted a partner/ friend or work colleague who replied an hour later and you went off on them? Did you maybe  consider they may have been experiencing a terrible day? Their day may have been so bad that it slipped their mind to reply and hence they actually were not being dismissive of you in the first place.
It's great to recognize that as individuals we are important but sometimes there are bigger fish to fry than us.


2. Work on yourself first

“Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother’s eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye?  How can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ when all the time there is a plank in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye. Matthew 7:3-5. This bible verse encompasses so much truth in it that further explanation may water it down.

3. Honesty is key
It's important to invest in having good people around you. Seek to find people who keep you grounded. These are the type of individuals who will critic your words and deeds in a firm but constructive manner. Warren Buffet once summed this up by saying “Honesty is a very expensive gift, Don't expect it from cheap people.”

4. Celebrate thyself
You will never be everyone's cup of tea and therefore not all will appreciate your achievements. Seek to appreciate yourself first. Choose to celebrate your personal gains, wins, achievements no matter how small. Once you recognize the progress you are gradually making, it shall continue to provide you with the intrinsic motivation needed to keep working on your goals.

5. Change begins with you

From the start of the year I had generated a list of things I wished would be different, however upon further exploring the same, I learned one simple thing“Be the change that you wish to see in the world.” Mahatma Gandhi. Other people will gradually emulate you once you establish consistency.

As the year comes to a close seek to recognize that " There are far better things ahead than any we leave behind." C.S Lewis.